Opus Day 13: Stew in a Pot

[Barque]

“When we want to get on with the alchemy of our life work, we might look into the vessel that holds the raw material of our lives. In it we can find our painful memories; people who got in the way, experiments that failed, hopes and promises that didn’t work out, losses and failures, rejections and interrupted careers.

All of this “bad” stuff from the past is like compost. We have to go and gather it and place it in the pile that will be the dark resource for the alchemy about to take place. Jung said that if you don’t have a pile of rotten stuff to work with, you should go out and get some. Most of us don’t have to look far. We are painfully aware of the many dark moments in our work history and our problem is more an unwillingness to dredge it up and look at it once again than to have an empty pot.
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Alchemists referred to this phase of the Work as nigredo, the blackening. In the laboratory, lengthy and strong heat has given the mass of material in the vessels a dark, and perhaps even charred, appearance. Metaphorically, the material of our life, subjected now to the heat of anxious consideration, memory, and analysis, shows its darkness and shadow, its bitterness and sadness."

Today’s Work: Moore advises, “Telling your unhappy stories, calling up memories you might rather leave untouched, and remembering people who didn’t help you much on your way is all valuable - your bad experiences are as much a part of you as the good ones, and to be fully present to your current work, you have to include them as well.” Practice deep breathing exercises or quietly meditate, stilling the mind, as you prepare to reconcile with the past. Start a regular daily meditation practice.

Share your responses with Barque readers, by replying to this discussion.

[Julianne]

Lately, I've been reviewing a lot of old events and decisions. In fact, I've been unable to stop their 'intrusion.' At times I've gone deeply into these thoughts, to the point of trying to find comfort in pretending that I could have done things differently, imagining myself living a different past. Recently I left a place I'd been living in for a long time, a place that was comforting but restricting. A part of me needed to break free and leave, and so I did. Another part is still coming to terms with what I have consciously and unconsciously created. Now I'm working on moving into the 'mystery' of the future with faith and trust. I can see why things had to happen the way they did. I'm trying to accept myself as I am and not think I could have learned what I know now, unless things unfolded as they did.